Welcome to the forum HELP_Stressed.

I understand your point about how a reduced interest rate and/or extended term might help you to avoid any other type of action in respect of your debts. As you seem to be aware however, large unsecured loans with reasonable interest rates aren't readily available. It also doesn't seem as though there's enough equity in your home to consolidate all of the debt into a secured loan.

Could you please let us know whether your home is jointly owned?

When you mention keeping the situation separate from your wife are you referring to a possible debt solution that only involves you, or do you mean that you don't want your wife to be aware of this at all?

Hi there Ian - thanks for reaching out for advice.

I'm glad that you did, because there is a very good chance that you will have options available to you, based on the information you have given so far. I have personally dealt with countless individuals in a similar situation to yourself over the years and it is very rare that it hasn't been possible to organise an appropriate solution.

The amount of equity in your home, if your figures are correct, should mean that a solution such as a Protected Trust Deed may well be an effective solution for you, allowing you to get free of the debts within a reasonably short period of time but still keeping your home.
As long as the debts you refer to aren't joint with your wife then there shouldn't be any reason why she would need to be involved in this either.

There may be other options too, such as the Debt Arrangement Scheme, but we'd really need more information about your circumstances before we could give you meaningful advice. Either myself or the other expert on the forum, Sarah, would be happy to look at your situation in more detail for you if you wish.